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Self Interrupting Trauma

I had the pleasure of being interviewed by the down to earth editor, producer, and writer extraordinaire Kelley Evans of ESPN Defeated recently. It was the fifth interview I completed for Black Women About Business so I felt this would be no different than the others. Like the other interviews, I rehearsed my talking points and reflected on what Kelley might ask me. Feeling as prepared as I could, I answered the phone, and was instantly at ease by Kelley's southern drawl.

A few questions in, I thought, I got this. And then one of my responses sparked a follow up question. Before I knew it I was talking about the pain of growing up with trauma. Kelley asked my permission to discuss the specificity of my trauma, and with slight trepidation I chose to name it. I could have opted to keep it private, but I decided this was, like everything else, part of the fabric of my life. A component of the Black Women About Business story. And it was a story that was important to tell.

Naming the trauma in that moment shifted something in me. It made me recall something I heard once: that when we expose the pain of our past we no longer carry shame. I hadn't consciously carried shame, but as I reflected over my life, the sparse times I talked about my trauma with others, and the struggle to finish my memoir, I realized that shame was still right below the surface for me. And now that I've exposed my trauma to the world, I feel freer. It was as if, for the first time, I had made this connection that all my work, all of me, was connected by this thread of trauma that I have fought my entire life to interrupt.

Of course, Black Women About Business is about the business of our business in sisterhood, but it's also about doing the internal work to be free from the pain of our past. That's what self interruption is all about. Disassociating from the toxic messages we've gotten from our abusers, the society at large, and yes, sometimes even the people we love the most. Self interruption is about breaking away from the noise that tells us we're not good enough, we're not beautiful enough, we're not smart enough to be about the business that we were called to do. That's real transformation. Living a life out loud. On purpose. And unapologetically. That's Black Women About Business.

You might be thinking, where do I fit into that? I haven't experienced trauma. And I would argue that as a black woman living in America, and beyond, we experience trauma all the time. So although you may not have experienced the kind of trauma I've experienced, you too, my sister, have experienced the 'lived black woman experience' of trauma which, in my opinion, could use some interrupting.

Won't you join me in interrupting yourself in order to be wildly successful in business and in life? We launch on December 4 and we want you to be part of our Black Women About Business tribe. Sign up today at www.blackwomenaboutbiz.com. And tell your tribe about us. Every black woman needs to know about our work and we need you to help us spread the word. In the meantime, can't wait to interrupt with you!

In the spirit of healing and wholeness,

Demarra



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